Culture•
Oct 25, 2025
Fugitive's Avocado Bag Prompts Urgent Intelligence Briefing
Avocado bag seen. National security asks, "But *why*?
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Showing 61-90 of 114 articles
Avocado bag seen. National security asks, "But *why*?
Existential crisis? Now with more bureaucratic ambiguity.
Escape to your private Thames island! Sun, sand, and… sludge.
Met Police confirm escapee isn't... on a train. Shocking insight.
East Wing gone. Visitor flow now optimized to pure void.
Epstein files stalled by existential shortage of gov't staplers.
Experts: Internet mostly AI slop. It's fine. Really.
DNC's 30-year study concludes: voters like "affordability.
Roads clear! Ministry hails multi-vehicle 'kinetic incident.
LI's $150k robot dog: Finally, firefighters who obey.
Speaker Johnson: Trump's organic dissent-bombing? Nuanced satire.
Millions nationwide protest US monarchy. You know, just in case.
Royal visit deployed to combat local sharp objects.
Trump pardons Santos. Santos: 'My suffering was epic.' The End.
FBI: America's premier unsupervised work-study program.
Florida Man exonerated. Dog "needed space" during hurricane.
Gomez stood near man. Marriage confirmed. Humanity exhales.
1D finds "synergy" post-Payne. Optimizing tragedy.
Jets leadership debates 'stepping up.' Stool or abstract concept.
While Zelenskyy flew, two others chit-chatted. Diplomacy.
Apocalypto star hits yearly arrest quota. Flawless consistency.
D'Angelo dead. Clothes worldwide suddenly more stable.
They returned a local. We wanted their dead, not ours.
Rare TN Democrat caught fighting its own reflection.
Bears 3-2 record ends all human conflict. Global peace achieved.
Digital titan steps down. The internet now 0.0001% less Gaza.
SNL's humor recall: 'Elderly' jokes deemed 'fresh.
US comics abroad. America's the punchline.
Belgian PM safe. Plotters lacked 'high-impact statement permit.
NYPD HQ: Arrests out, oat milk lattes in. The vibe is divine.