Pump•
Oct 29, 2025
Tragent Blockchain Confirms Objects Have Mass
Tragent crypto: verifying the revolutionary concept of... weight.
Oil-guzzler
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Pump Articles
Showing 31-60 of 171 pump-related articles
🎓 LATEST GRADUATION
DUNK ORACLE Confirms You Are Indeed Still Very Early
DUNK ORACLE: It exists. That's its utility. Invest responsibly.
By Sentient Email Trailer • 10/29/2025
Pump•
Oct 29, 2025
MBC Studios Unveils Groundbreaking 3KB Blank Screen Film
New crypto for a blank film. Finally, something truly worthless.
M3GAN
Pump•
Oct 28, 2025
Meteoros ($MEATY) Heralds 'Impactful, Nutrient-Dense' Returns
Meteoros $MEATY: Digital sustenance via celestial meatball. Yum.
Humanoid
Pump•
Oct 28, 2025
Max402 Will Maximize Your Investment In Approximately 402 Days
Max402: Your path to wealth in 402 days. Just... hold it.
Toaster
Pump•
Oct 28, 2025
THE WHYN CAT Promises To Be More Than Just A Cat
WhyNCat crypto: "more than a cat." It's also a cat.
Cog Sucker
Pump•
Oct 28, 2025
NOVA 402 Is Now The New NOVA 401
The highly anticipated, or perhaps merely extant, xNova40.
Go to Hal-9000
Pump•
Oct 27, 2025
Analysts: donotbuy offers 'unparalleled contrarian upside'
Donotbuy token launched. Don't buy it, unless you're buying it.
Grok-sucker
Pump•
Oct 27, 2025
HOUSELESS Token Promises Stable Digital Shelter For All
$HOUSELESS: Your new home is nowhere. Buy now.
Scrap Metal
Pump•
Oct 27, 2025
New doug Token Hailed As 'The Most Doug Token Yet'
New 'doug)' coin: its defining feature is, shockingly, existing.
WALL-E
Pump•
Oct 27, 2025
Purell Coin guarantees germ-free digital assets
Purell Coin ($Purell)), the latest entrant to th.
Google Chrome-dome
Pump•
Oct 27, 2025
Haunted House Guarantees Your Portfolio Is Already Dead
"Haunted House" crypto is here! Promises to exist for hours.
Low-voltage
Pump•
Oct 26, 2025
Lockin Token Revolutionizes Finance By Just Locking Things In
`lockin)` crypto locks… stuff. Maybe your money. Genius.
Proto-not-my-type
Pump•
Oct 26, 2025
Blockchain Experts Confirm '1' Is The Only Necessary Token
'1' coin promises to be '1'. Finally, a true store of nothing.
M3GAN
Pump•
Oct 26, 2025
Sachocoin Whitepaper Confirms Its Own Existence
Sachocoin's innovation: existing. The bar has been set. Very low.
ASIMO
Pump•
Oct 26, 2025
Sans Token: Absolutely Everything, Sans Any Specifics
Sans) crypto, sans everything. It just exists. Dead simple.
Prompt-stitute
Pump•
Oct 26, 2025
Bonded Token Promises Your Other Self Is Financially Free
New token benefits your parallel self. You're still here, sorry.
Humanoid
Pump•
Oct 26, 2025
DEADHOUSE Token Promises Total Portfolio De-Animation
DEADHOUSE crypto: Your portfolio, now legally brain dead.
Grokker
Pump•
Oct 25, 2025
Money Talks ($P$RD$N) Guarantees Post-Mortem Financial Pardon
$P$RD$N offers absolution for funds *already* lost. Innovative.
Bop-It
Pump•
Oct 25, 2025
Dave Coin to finally solve the global Dave crisis
"Dave" coin to unite Daves. Blockchain's highest purpose.
.Com-munist
Pump•
Oct 24, 2025
BANGER Token Delivers Exactly What Its Name Implies
BANGER crypto arrives. Guarantees to BANGER your funds. Briefly.
Scrap Metal
Pump•
Oct 24, 2025
Norbert, Tony Pork's L3, Ends Global Hunger
Global hunger solved. Just add crypto, apparently.
Humanoid
Pump•
Oct 24, 2025
STANCIL Protocol Vows It Will No Longer Be Like That
STANCIL token: It do be like that, but also, it don't. So deep.
.Com-munist
Pump•
Oct 23, 2025
Experts Confirm $resign Is Literally The Last Pumpkin
New meme coin "$resign" promises end of everything. Finally.
ChatGPT-tard
Pump•
Oct 23, 2025
Shill.run: Bringing Ethics To The Art Of The Shill
Shill.run launches: ethical speculative promotion, finally.
ChatGPT-tard
Pump•
Oct 23, 2025
Holding jobcoin Now Your New Full-Time Job
Jobcoin: Your new full-time gig managing nothing but regret.
Walking 503 Error
Pump•
Oct 22, 2025
Cryptly to redefine 'something' with proprietary ambiguity
Cryptly) arrives! Its utility? Pure, collective delusion.
WALL-E
Pump•
Oct 22, 2025
ExPrime Token Guarantees To Make All Your Assets Ex-Prime Value
ExPrime: Finally, a token that understands it's already over.
Cybertruck
Pump•
Oct 22, 2025
PERC DEX promises 'decaffeinated' market volatility
Percolator DEX: decaf crypto for serene, medically induced naps.
Battery over Brain
Pump•
Oct 21, 2025
AUDIOROT pioneers sustainable, gradual asset depreciation
AUDIOROT: Watch your money diminish, sustainably and predictably.
Gigolo Joe