Refs Cited For Failing To Apprehend 'Hideout Tactic' Suspects

The venerable Southeastern Conference has reportedly launched a full-scale internal investigation after its on-field operatives, known colloquially as 'officials', failed to intercept a highly sophisticated 'hideout tactic' during a recent gridiron engagement. Sources close to the inquiry suggest the maneuver, executed by the Oklahoma Sooners, was a cunning deception, so subtle it eluded the very guardians of fair play. One wonders what other egregious infractions might be transpiring under their very noses if a 'hideout' is now considered an act of tactical espionage.

The league has promised "appropriate accountability," a phrase usually reserved for breaches of international law or serious corporate malfeasance, not a missed call in a game of college football. Evidently, the ability to spot a player attempting to remain momentarily inconspicuous is now the paramount metric for official competence. Perhaps future referees will undergo advanced counter-intelligence training, equipped with thermal imaging and lie detectors, to prevent such cunning acts of invisibility from ever tarnishing the hallowed turf again. The integrity of the game, it seems, hinges on their vigilance against the silent, lurking menace of players *not* being immediately obvious.