Nation Wonders: Is My Million Dollars Even Real Money

It appears the American dream, or at least its aspirational real estate component, is suffering from a severe case of inflation-induced inadequacy. Recent analyses, helpfully provided by arbiters of aspirational living like Realtor.com, confirm what many of us have suspected during our daily commutes past increasingly ostentatious properties: a million dollars simply isn’t what it used to be.

Indeed, merely possessing a seven-figure sum no longer guarantees entry into the exclusive upper echelons of the US housing market. The lamentable threshold for a truly "luxury home" has, tragically, ascended beyond mere millions. One can almost hear the collective sigh of relief from those accustomed to homes featuring more bathrooms than family members, now that their *true* opulence is not easily confused with the meager holdings of a common millionaire. Perhaps soon, we'll need a new currency, free from the indignity of being associated with anything less than a private island. It's a cruel world when one's "nest egg" only buys the equivalent of a slightly larger nest.