Former Prosecutor Shocked By Lack Of Lifetime Immunity

One can only imagine the sheer bewilderment that must have washed over former Southern District of New York prosecutor Maurene Comey when she discovered, to her apparent horror, that her employment was, in fact, terminable. Her recent legal filing alleges her July ouster was "unlawful and unconstitutional," prompting a collective raised eyebrow from anyone who’s ever, you know, *had a job*.

It seems the expectation of a divine, or at least statutorily enshrined, right to lifelong tenure in a position of public service was not merely an abstract concept but a deeply held conviction. One might assume that an individual intimately familiar with the intricacies of legal frameworks would grasp the distinction between a constitutional office and, say, a particularly stubborn barnacle on the ship of state.

Perhaps Ms. Comey believed her role transcended the mundane strictures of the American Constitution as it applies to mere mortals. The shock, we can only surmise, must have been akin to discovering gravity applies even to those who diligently enforce its rules on others.