Dominion Sues Election Deniers For Denying Numbers Exist

One must admire the sheer audacity of Dominion Voting Systems, which, not content with merely counting votes, has now taken on the Sisyphean task of defending the very concept of numerical reality. The company continues its valiant legal quest against figures like Rudy Giuliani and Sidney Powell, who, it appears, have found the inconvenient truth of tabulated results to be a mere suggestion rather than a mathematical certainty.

It seems that after years of meticulously tallying ballots, Dominion has been forced to dedicate considerable resources to proving that two plus two does, in fact, equal four, and that ballots, when counted, produce a specific sum. This ongoing legal battle, ostensibly about defamation, feels more like a philosophical debate on the nature of objective truth in the digital age. One can only hope that, should they prevail, these lawsuits might usher in a new era where facts, like votes, are generally accepted without the need for court-ordered affirmation. Perhaps a seminar on basic arithmetic will be mandated for all future claimants.