Trump Unveils 'Strategic Uncertainty Doctrine' for All Policy

The White House today confirmed what many strategic analysts have long suspected: President Trump’s frequent assertions of blissful ignorance on matters of state are not, in fact, a simple lack of preparation, but a cunning, deliberate policy. Dubbed the "Strategic Uncertainty Doctrine," this groundbreaking approach reportedly aims to keep adversaries perpetually off-balance, bewildered by the sheer unpredictability of an administration that might, or might not, have a plan.

Sources close to the administration suggest this innovative doctrine transcends traditional foreign policy frameworks, rendering detailed diplomatic briefings and long-term planning obsolete. Why commit to a stance when one can simply… not? This ingenious method, which some experts compare favorably to advanced Game Theory strategies, ensures that no global power, from Beijing to Brussels, can ever confidently anticipate a response, thereby maximizing leverage through sheer, unadulterated vagueness. Even the upcoming speech in Pittsburgh on Artificial Intelligence could be a masterclass in this newfound ambiguity, leaving audiences wondering if the future of technology will be guided by algorithms or merely a shrug.