NATO Confused As Turkey Apparently Just 'Visiting' All Along

NATO officials, having apparently just finished rearranging their office furniture, expressed a collective shrug this week after learning one of their longest-standing members, Turkey, had formally applied to join the BRICS bloc. The move reportedly came as a surprise to those who believed Turkey's seventy-plus years within the North Atlantic Treaty Organization signified anything more than a polite, extended houseguest situation. One can almost picture the collective scratch of heads across Brussels as diplomats pondered if the application form included a section for "exit strategy from current, inconveniently Western-aligned commitments."

The stated aim, of course, is to increase global influence and forge "new connections" beyond its traditional, presumably now rather tiresome, Western allies. It's a bold strategy, truly, to enhance one's international standing by simply collecting alliances like rare stamps, regardless of ideological compatibility or the potential for diplomatic whiplash. Perhaps the unspoken goal is to eventually join *every* international organization, thereby achieving peak influence through sheer omnipresence, or at least ensuring nobody can ever really predict where one stands on any given Tuesday. One can only imagine the filing nightmare at NATO headquarters.