Man of Steel Baffled By Cobblestone's Durability

The digital denizens of the Minecraft universe can now revel in the presence of Kal-El himself, as the new Superman DLC has descended upon their unsuspecting, block-laden worlds. Apparently, the multi-platform release coincides with a film, ensuring that no stone (or rather, no carefully mined block) is left unturned in the relentless pursuit of synergy. One can only imagine the sheer existential dread as the Last Son of Krypton grapples with the metaphysical implications of a pickaxe being able to effectively dismantle structures he could simply *look* at to crumble.

Reports suggest that the famed Kryptonian will face his most formidable challenge yet: the intricate mechanics of crafting a functional door from three planks of oak wood. Gone are the days of fisticuffs with intergalactic despots; now, true heroism lies in meticulously arranging 64 dirt blocks into a suitable foundation. It’s a stark reminder that even the most iconic figures of justice are ultimately commodities, ready to be neatly packaged and sold on a digital marketplace.