HBO Max Removes Scooby, Citing 'Excessive Solving Of Problems'

Warner Bros. Discovery, in a bold strategic move, has streamlined its content catalog, notably excising the vast majority of Scooby-Doo productions from its HBO Max streaming platform. The official, if subtly delivered, rationale appears to be an internal audit revealing an alarming prevalence of "problem-solving" within the animated franchise. This, apparently, is no longer aligned with the company’s forward-looking vision.

One can only assume that the relentless unmasking of local ne'er-do-wells and the consistent triumph of deductive reasoning posed an existential threat to the delicate ecosystem of unresolved corporate dilemmas and lingering societal issues. Perhaps the management at Warner Bros. Discovery concluded that a weekly dose of adolescent detectives actually *fixing* things might set an unrealistic precedent for a public increasingly comfortable with, shall we say, 'managed ambiguity'. It's a brave new world where perhaps, some mysteries are simply better left, well, mysterious.