FEMA Employee Placed On Leave For Flag Heresy
FEMA employee fired for questioning Kirk's half-mast eligibility.
A dedicated public servant, employed by the Federal Emergency Management Agency, has reportedly been relieved of duty for a brief period, following an alleged lapse in patriotic decorum. The employee's grave error? Questioning the appropriateness of lowering flags to half-staff in honor of Charlie Kirk, a figure whose public pronouncements rarely shy from controversy.
It seems that while the agency typically concerns itself with hurricanes, earthquakes, and other mundane acts of God, a data analyst’s critical eye for vexillological protocol has taken precedence. Such profound insights into proper flag display have led to an administrative leave for the offending party, proving that no disaster is too pressing to overshadow a perceived slight against symbolic fabric.
One can only speculate on the depth of the inquiry now underway. Perhaps new federal guidelines will soon emerge, mandating daily loyalty oaths to fabric squares, ensuring that critical infrastructure remains uncompromised by rogue opinions on national mourning.
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