Doctors Warn Of Xenoblade Key-Art Induced Aesthetic Shock

Reports emerging from medical professionals this week suggest an alarming rise in what some are terming "aesthetic overload syndrome," directly linked to the latest visual dissemination from Nintendo. The company, known for its commitment to both entertainment and, apparently, ocular intensity, recently pushed a series of promotional images for the critically acclaimed Xenoblade Chronicles series through its "Nintendo Today" application, available on both iOS and Android platforms.

Patients, many displaying symptoms consistent with a mild form of Stendhal syndrome, reported sensations ranging from lightheadedness to an overwhelming urge to purchase collectible figurines. One doctor, speaking anonymously, described the key-art as "aggressively vibrant," noting that some individuals exhibited pupil dilation and an inability to focus on real-world responsibilities post-viewing. The sheer graphical opulence, it seems, can induce a temporary fugue state.

While Nintendo has yet to issue a public health warning, or indeed any statement beyond "isn't it pretty?", experts are advising caution. Perhaps, in an age where every pixel is a meticulously crafted emotional trigger, corporations bear a greater responsibility than merely presenting "gorgeous" digital artwork. Or, perhaps, fans should simply invest in stronger sunglasses.