Coinbase Foresees DeFi Becoming Just… Banking

America’s premier purveyor of digital receipts, Coinbase, has offered a truly groundbreaking vision for the future of decentralized finance. Apparently, the once-rebellious domain of permissionless transactions is set to mature into something remarkably similar to... well, just finance. With ‘institutionalization’ and ‘regulation’ now the desired growth trajectory, one can almost hear the soft hum of compliance departments being fitted with artisanal espresso machines. The revolution, it seems, will be meticulously documented and approved.

Meanwhile, the perpetual quest for new chains to ‘disrupt’ existing ones continues unabated, a digital hydra shedding and growing heads with predictable regularity. And let us not overlook the enduring mystique of NFTs, those glorious digital certificates that verify one’s unique, undeniable claim to… well, to a digital receipt. Truly, the pioneering spirit of innovation persists, even as it circles back to familiar territory.

So, the future, as envisioned by those who stand to profit most from its domestication, appears to be one where the wild west of crypto trades its spurs for a tailored suit, complete with a sensible pension plan. The path to liberation, it seems, leads directly through the lobby of a very traditional financial institution. Who knew?