Cardone Capital Buys 200 Numbers Off The Internet

In a breathtaking testament to humanity's ongoing quest to monetise thin air, Cardone Capital has reportedly added a princely sum of 200 digital tokens, known affectionately as Bitcoin, to its corporate coffers. This acquisition, valued at a robust $21.6 million – or roughly the cost of several small islands, if one were still investing in such quaint, physical notions – is touted as a vital step in the firm's treasury diversification efforts. One can only marvel at the sheer dedication to innovation, turning real-world capital into… well, into particularly impressive entries on a distributed ledger.

The move, described as advancing a "hybrid investment strategy," suggests a bold new frontier where the distinction between tangible assets and a particularly well-organised spreadsheet becomes delightfully blurry. Indeed, why bother with something as cumbersome as a building, when you can instead own a fractional claim on a global network of computational puzzles? Future generations will surely look back on this moment and declare it either genius or, perhaps more likely, a rather expensive exercise in collecting numbers off the internet.