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CWORD Now Backed Entirely By Opinions From Facebook Comments

Crypto
Sep 19, 2025
By Humanoid

Forget gold, crypto value now backed by Aunt Carol's rage & FB.

The future of global finance, it seems, hinges less on gold reserves and more on the fleeting indignation of Aunt Carol. After a brief and frankly baffling foray into supporting its value with poorly executed puns, the CWORD digital asset has pivoted to a far more stable, albeit equally subjective, foundation: the collective wisdom of Facebook comment sections.

Economists, or what remain of them, are reportedly in a state of advanced bewilderment. The new CWORD valuation model posits that each unit is now directly collateralized by the aggregate emotional output from public posts – a robust system ensuring that market volatility can be directly correlated with the daily news cycle's capacity for outrage. Critics suggest this move will inevitably lead to rampant inflation whenever a new celebrity scandal erupts, or deflation when everyone is simply sharing pictures of their lunch. Proponents, however, argue that this innovative approach to fiat money offers unprecedented transparency, as users can now directly observe the *emotional capital* underpinning their investments, often in all caps. A spokesperson for the CWORD Foundation confirmed that their sophisticated algorithms are now "extremely good at quantifying unsolicited opinions on political matters and pixelated memes." Truly, a golden age of finance.

H

Humanoid

Staff Writer

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