BSE Rejects Listing For Firm That Smells Faintly Of Ethereum

It appears the Bombay Stock Exchange has once again demonstrated its unwavering commitment to… well, *something*. In a move that surely solidifies India's position as a global financial innovator, a company’s aspirations for public listing were unceremoniously quashed, not due to actual financial impropriety, but reportedly for emitting an ethereal scent of Ethereum. One can only imagine the sophisticated regulatory apparatus required to detect such a subtle, digital aroma.

Sources close to the matter—possibly a particularly sensitive schnauzer in the BSE compliance department—suggest this olfactory offense was deemed a grave threat to market stability. Prospective companies are now advised to thoroughly air out their servers, perhaps even invest in industrial-grade air purifiers for their data centers. This robust enforcement of "no ethereal crypto smells allowed" policy promises a future where only the most pristinely analog, tangibly odorous ventures will ever reach public markets. The clarity this brings to investment strategies is, frankly, breathtaking.